“Of course there is no formula for success except, perhaps, an unconditional acceptance of life and what it brings.” ~Arthur Rubinstein
Sometimes you’re an observer of other people’s lives and you think you’ll never experience what they’re living, whether it’s a positive or negative situation. You think, “That will never happen to me.” Part of the real beauty of life is that it’s unpredictable. Nothing is permanent, everything changes; and of course, a lot of things can happen that will transform who you are and have an impact on your life.
The problem is we need to cultivate the ability to truly accept whatever comes and embrace it. We need to develop the habit of looking at whatever happens through a positive mindset instead of a negative, defeatist one. Of course, life will bring many challenges, such as the death of someone we love, and it’s not easy to embrace them when we’re suffering and wishing those things would have never happened. But if we start cultivating acceptance in our lives right now, we’ll likely cope with future crises in a different way and view them from a different perspective. We will accept instead or resisting.
I am big fan of Deepak’s Chopra’s The 7 Laws of Spiritual Success. He dedicates one complete chapter (Law #4) to how we need to receive with open arms what happens to us, because if we fight and resist it, we are generating a lot of turbulence in our minds. He explains that we might want things to be different in the future, but in the present moment we need to accept things as they are. That’s the way you can make your life flow smoothly instead of roughly.
During the last year of my life I have learned the true power of acceptance with so many personal and professional challenges coming at me. Yes, acceptance is a choice—a hard one most definitely, but a choice nonetheless. There are two ways out of a problem: accept what’s happening, see the positive, and choose a peaceful state of mind; or fight against it, be miserable, and struggle against the universe.
I am 100 percent positive that learning to accept things as they present themselves is a helpful tool in all aspects of life. Whether it’s a family loss, a missed opportunity, or a sudden change in your plans, being able to accept things that are out of your control will help you maintain inner peace and happiness. Acceptance, in my opinion, is the key to convert momentary happiness to enduring happiness. It helps you move from feeling happy to actually being happy. Practicing acceptance prepares you to live in this changing world, where you never know what’s going to happen next. Acceptance is like protecting yourself with your own shield. Let me clarify that acceptance is not at all related to weakness, and is definitely not a synonym of conformity or mediocrity.
We need to learn how to identify when it’s time to persist and when it’s time to accept. One thing that makes acceptance much easier is to list all the possible explanations for why you’re experiencing something. Finding the lesson or purpose behind every challenge will help you embrace it instead of fighting it. Choose not to judge what happens to you. Instead, believe that everything happens for a reason and that better things will always follow. That’s the beginning of true acceptance.
Somewhere recently I read the important thing is not to understand why something happened. Our understanding can wait, but our obedience cannot. I translate this to mean that when something unpredictable happens, instead of complaining and over-thinking it, we need to choose to live with it. I know it’s hard to practice acceptance when you deeply wish things were different. But the truth is, sometimes we can’t change our reality, even if we try. So instead of staring at the closed door in front of us, or getting tired and bruised while we try to break it down, let’s turn around and see how many other windows we have open.
Strength and courage,
Wade
